“He was caught running out of the basement into the lobby. He’s a dangerous man.”
So he was the one who was making those noises in the basement. He heard me coming in and ran up into the lobby. He was caught because of my going into the basement. Things are connected again. If I hadn’t gotten that soap I wouldn’t have gone into the basement to wash. If I hadn’t been dirty I wouldn’t want to wash. If I wasn’t watching the hotel for Lynn I wouldn’t have noticed the man. I wouldn’t be watching the hotel if Lynn hadn’t given me tea and pastry and said she understood pain.
I say to the policeman, “It’s all for the best.”
“What?”
“For the best.”
He exchanges a look with another policeman who has come in.
“She needs treatment,” the other policeman says. “She’s loony.” It is as if I am not standing right there and hearing him.
I say, “No sirs, I’m not loony. You see my father threatened me so much that I ran away. Then I hit my head on the ground. I got an injury to my brain.”
“What did you do wrong that your father threatened you?” the first policeman says in a menacing tone.
“I was minding my own business.”
The one who called me loony has a grin on as he says, “All right, lady, leave now. We’ll find you again when we need you.”
At least he called me a lady. Then he startles me by reaching into his pocket, taking out some money, and giving it to me. “Get yourself something to eat.”
Suddenly it is dusk and I am far away from the police station and in an area of the city where I have never been before. I find a hallway to sleep in instead of going to the shelter. I wake in the middle of the night wanting to pee badly. I think I have a kidney disease, it takes a long time for my pee to come out. I pick up my bag and start walking, looking for a public toilet. The night is very quiet and cold, and unusually bright with numerous stars and a round moon against the sky. As I turn to a curb I see a cat scratching the ground.
“Get lost, you dirty pest,” I yell at him.
He ignores me and I go my way.
I’ll stay away from the hotel for a day or two to make sure the police aren’t looking for me, I decide. Then I’ll go back there and tell Lynn about the man and the police questioning me. I’ll tell her, because of my identifying him to the police, he is most likely behind bars and the hotel isn’t in immediate danger. Then I’ll ask her if in return she will let me sleep in the basement for the rest of the winter. I know she will say yes.
Nahid Rachlin, born in Iran, came to the United States to attend college and stayed. Among her publications are a memoir, PERSIAN GIRLS, fall 2006 (Penguin), four novels, JUMPING OVER FIRE (City Lights), FOREIGNER (W.W. Norton), MARRIED TO A STRANGER (E.P.Dutton), THE HEART'S DESIRE (City Lights),and a collection of short stories, VEILS(City Lights). While a student she held a Doubleday-Columbia fellowship and a Wallace Stegner Fellowship (Stanford). The grants and awards she has received include, the Bennet Cerf Award, PEN Syndicated Fiction Project Award, and a National Endowment for the Arts grant. Her website: http://www.nahidrachlin.com
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